Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord. Eph 6:4

In this episode of the Messy Family Podcast, hosts Mike and Alicia Hernon celebrate their 10th year of the podcast and introduce the new studio, setting the stage for a discussion on fatherhood and leadership in the home. They emphasize that while fathers are called by God to lead, many struggle to understand what that truly means in a world that often undermines their role.

True leadership is not about domination but about serving, sacrificing, and guiding with love, following Christ’s example. A father’s success is measured by the unity in his marriage and family, and when discord arises, it signals a need to recalibrate leadership. Mike and Alicia challenge men to overcome passivity, a struggle rooted in Adam’s sin, and to step up, protect, and guide their families with intentional love. Practical steps for dads include pursuing their wives first, taking initiative in family life, loving sacrificially, and leading with unity in mind.

They highlight research showing that a father’s presence has a profound impact on his children’s faith, success, and well-being. While many men feel incompetent in the home, undervalue their influence, or struggle with passivity, Mike and Alicia encourage them to embrace the God-given mission of fatherhood with confidence, knowing that great men and strong fathers are desperately needed today.

Key Takeaways

Husbands are called to lead in the home because this is how God is going to make them holy and you were created to give first to be able to receive.

You know you are leading when there is unity, when you are challenged, and when your wife feels safe.

Men need to go in to battle and fight against the tendency to be passive or to avoid what they do not feel competent at.

Never doubt how important you are in the life of your wife and children - they need you!

Couple Discussion Questions

Are we happy with our roles of leading our family right now? How are we doing?

How can I (wife) support you (husband) in leading our family?

For more information on this and other topics visit: https://www.messyfamilyproject.org/