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Messy Family Podcast : Catholic Conversations on Marriage and Family

Parenting is not a clean-cut, simple process for those who like to follow the rules. Family life is messy and unpredictable, but it is the greatest adventure you will ever have. We are Mike and Alicia Hernon, parents of 10 children ranging from 10 to 27 and we would like to invite you into some of the conversations we have had with each other about marriage, parenting, and Catholic family life. Our hope is that our conversation sparks a dialogue between you and your spouse that leads to greater unity and intentional Christian parenting in your home. Listen in to our podcast and start the conversation as we seek to lead our families to heaven. Visit us at https:///www/MessyFamilyProject.org for resources, guides, links and show notes.
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Messy Family Podcast : Catholic Conversations on Marriage and Family
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Mar 10, 2025

Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.  Genesis 2:24

 

Summary

Unity between man and woman was God’s original plan, but the Fall not only broke our relationship with God, it also broke our relationship with each other.  But the good news is that Jesus has given us grace in the sacrament of Matrimony so we can have a oneness in marriage that would be impossible otherwise!  With unity, couples can handle anything life dishes out. Without it, even the easy things will seem hard. Couples need to constantly be striving for unity, because if spouses aren’t intentional, those marriages will drift apart!  In this podcast, we will give you three tools - honoring, forgiveness, and vulnerability - that you can use to start moving towards your spouse.  We need to intentionally use these tools to work towards the greater unity within the gift of marriage that God has for us.  

 

Key Takeaways

  • All couples must strive for unity - if you float along, you will drift apart

  • Unity was what we were made for, but the fall introduced distrust into the male/female relationships

  • There are three things you can do to move towards unity:  honoring, forgiveness, and vulnerability

  • On the scale of Affirmation/Criticism, choose to honor your spouse, even publicly to build them up

  • On the scale of Resentment/Forgiveness, choose to forgive them instead of being resentful of their shortcomings

  • On the scale of Detachment/Intimacy we need to choose vulnerability and openness to our spouse. 

 

Couple Discussion Questions

  • On a scale of 1-10, how are we doing in our unity? In which of the three areas can we do better? 

  • Which one of these three areas is the most challenging for me?  Why do I think that is?  

 

Resources

 

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